I've Looked at Clouds that Way - AHB

"To say I love you, right out loud"

I've had an interested and unexpected conversion experience this semester; I, Andrew Hans Berglund, have become a Joni Mitchell fan. No, I'm really serious.

In hindsight this shouldn't come as a complete surprise. Female vocalists have always been a huge attraction for me, so much that I remember really wanting to go to Lilith Fair when it was still touring (Sarah McLachlan had become something of a demi-goddess in my adolescent world).

So, how does this fit within a blog about religion and art. OH! I'm so glad that you asked.

For me music has always held a unique place within the realm of art. I'm something of a musician (when I use my imagination), and that is part of it; however, the really amazing talent of art is that it can define time and periods of life. When I look back on travels that I've taken and other meaningful moments or experiences there is invariably a song or album that relates to it - I call them mini-soundtracks. Other forms of art become experiences in themselves, and music does this as well, but songs also become a sort of bond between many different experiences. That is why I love well-done slideshows and films that really tap into this ability. The whole feeling unified.

After that intro of sorts, I wanna to talk about how Joni's music has become one of my mini-soundtracks for this trip. I now have a lot of different versions of songs from all periods of her long and successful career. It is really powerful to hear the same song take on a different meaning even though the words have changed. Let me see if I can explain that a bit.

The song "Both Sides, Now" has been performed an incredible amount of times in the last thirty or so years with a slew of different artists (Pete Seeger is the best) and each of these recordings has a different feel. The song really plays with the complexities of love and life, and Joni's whole meaning can be interpreted completely differently each time. In her early recordings, when she is about 25 years old, the song carries the incomplete yet overconfident knowledge of youth. Joni is singing about the illusions of life when she has barely even lived long enough to truly know them, but at the same time there is a sagacity that seems really universal.

Fast-forward to her 2000 recording featured in the film Love Actually (the scene where Emma Thompson cries in the bedroom) and the song takes on a different meaning. Here Joni is stripped of her youthful influence, a fact that is also expressed in the major change to her voice. At the age of almost 60, she really can talk about the expectations, failures, and successes of love.

I love both version, and I wouldn't want to choose between just one. What I think is really cool is that the artist can go through the same kind of process and transformation that the listener does. One song can have so many different meanings and expressions.




Both Sides Now - Joni Mitchell
Rows and flows of angel hair
And ice cream castles in the air
And feather canyons everywhere
Ive looked at clouds that way

But now they only block the sun
They rain and snow on everyone
So many things I would have done
But clouds got in my way
Ive looked at clouds from both sides now
From up and down, and still somehow
Its cloud illusions I recall
I really don't know clouds at all

Moons and Junes and ferris wheels
The dizzy dancing way you feel
As every fairy tale comes real
Ive looked at love that way

But now its just another show
You leave em laughing when you go
And if you care, don't let them know
Don't give yourself away

Ive looked at love from both sides now
From give and take, and still somehow
Its loves illusions I recall
I really don't know love at all

Tears and fears and feeling proud
To say I love you right out loud
Dreams and schemes and circus crowds
Ive looked at life that way

But now old friends are acting strange
They shake their heads, they say Ive changed
Well somethings lost, but somethings gained
In living every day

Ive looked at life from both sides now
From win and lose and still somehow
Its life's illusions I recall
I really don't know life at all
Ive looked at life from both sides now
From up and down, and still somehow
Its life's illusions I recall
I really don't know life at all